Dark Knight Rises Reviewers’ Lives Threatened

So it has come to this.

Why so serious?

In case you’re not familiar with the webcomic XKCD, that means I’ve been rendered a bit speechless. Rotten Tomatoes, the movie review site that collates reviews from all over and combines them into a critic score (and later allows the audience to score the movie) has been posting its collected advance reviews for The Dark Knight Rises, debuting at 12:01 AM Friday morning.

This has led to a pack of raving idiots bashing, trolling, and even death-threatening reviewers who have given it a less-than-positive review. Let’s face it:  Christopher Nolan set the bar pretty darn high with The Dark Knight, so expectations have never been higher. People have a strong attachment to Batman. People love Batman. People loved that movie, from its creepy-as-all-get-out depiction of the Joker to the thematic elements and other jargon that I’m not going to pretend I know much about.

But death threats? Is this what we’ve come to, internet?

(I guess that’s someone’s cue to “You Must Be New Here” me).

To anyone outraged that The Dark Knight Rises has been getting negative reviews, I have a few logical questions to ask you, and then I’m done until I review the damn movie myself in the wee hours of the morning on Friday.

Have you seen the movie?

Having seen or not seen it, can you distance yourself enough from your emotional attachment to the character to determine whether or not it’s a good movie? (Because seriously, I’ve read so many comics in the last few years that I started to lose touch with what a “good” comic was, maybe that’s the case here).

If the answer is “no” to either one of these questions…stop bashing and death-threatening. If the answer is “yes” to either one of these questions…still stop bashing and death-threatening. It’s embarrassing.

As with any and all preemptive reviews, you have to take them with a grain of salt. If you’re dead-set on seeing it no matter what the critics say, well, why aren’t you waiting until you watch the movie yourself anyway?

Stop angsting. Stop freaking out. Just wait and watch the freakin’ movie.

Maybe…just maybe these reviewers are right. And now, just for suggesting that, I’m going to go hide from the internet for a while.